An interview with Maynard - 2002-10-31

Personal details:

Q: How did you get your name?
A: "Maynard" was taken both from the lead singer from Tool, and Brother Maynard from a Monty Python movie. My last name "Almare" is just me having fun.

Q: How old are you?
A: I have 19 weeks and 3 days worth of playing time on this character, i have played since early August '99, and i am 19 irl.

Q: What level are you?
A: I am anywhere between level 75 and level 95, depending on my most resent reinc.

Q: How would you describe yourself?
Maynard grins evily.
A: "Maynard, the paladin hating, assassin stabbing, faerie-treant of infinite destruction!"

Q: Where do you live?
A: Dallas "Freaking" Texas, but I like my AOD home a lot more.

Mudding in general:

Q: How did you first get in contact with Ages of Despair?
A: My best friend irl, Tofy, informed me of something that i >MUST< play about a week after he started, so I got on, and he was SOOO RIGHT

Q: Does your friend still play?
A: He loves it here almost as much as I do, but he gets horrible lag when he connects from his college, so he can't get on as much as he would like to, but yes, he does.
Mephitic says: Ah yes, lag is responsible for so much
A: You're tellin me

Q: Do you regularly play or wiz on any other MUDs?
A: Nah, other muds can 'kiss it', aod's the place

Q: Are you a normal mudder or do you seldom log on?
A: If i don't log on one day, i make up for it the next by playing 9 or 10 hours. Actually, my record time is 18 hours straight, no restroom, no food, no standing up for a stretch. Just aod....aod....aod. The next day I would see text if I closed my eyes (or even blink).

Q: Have you met any fellow mudders in RL?
A: Yes, and here's the list of the ones Tofy and I have sucked into aod: Neotheblue, Nosferatu, Setsuna, Manendrin, Ann, Urania, Quintesence, Darkseraph, Kiwi. A couple of them have 'cided, but they have new accounts now I believe.

Game specific:

Q: What was your first kill and if you ever died, what was the first thing that killed you?
A: My first kill was a GIANT ANT! I thought I rocked so much, cause it had the word 'giant' in it. The first thing to kill me was a "squirrel". I was so [censored] that I didn't log back on for 2, maybe 3 hours.
Maynard grins.

Q: Did you ever get killed by a ("the") horrible creature?
A: I didn't know where that thing was until I was level 50, so nope.

Q: Who is your favourite and most hated npc respectively?
A: My most favoritest NPC would have to be Maendon, cause he's sexy and he gives me my sword. My most hated would have to be that jerk Evaan, cause he summons demons and they don't attack him, and it confuses me. (oh, and he's a pali).
Maynard lafs.
Editors note: Watch this space

Q: What is the funniest/strangest thing that ever happened to you on AoD?
A: The funniest would have to be the time I realized I was a member of 5 different guilds, but that was back when you didn't have to "learn" a new class. The strangest would be when Ashandarei(friend irl, not saying who he's a char of) died, and died, and died, and died, and died, and died, and died, and died, and died, and died, all in the same kill. He gave me a good absorb for my dblade though.

Q: Do you have any piece of equipment you just can't live without?
A: That would >have< to be my...well, my eq sucks. I keep reincing back to my death blade though, so would that count?
Mephitic says: Defiantly
A: Good

Q: Do you have a "special place" where you like to hang out, a private corner so to speak?
A: When I'm on, I'm killing. I guess Avalon would be my current "hang out" because I've been killing there a lot. That is some good "lootin" if ya know what I mean.

Q: How much of your time on AOD do you spend hanging out or chatting compared with exping?
A: Well, I guess for every minute I'm talking there is a good hour I'm killing, and that minute of talking is while I'm killing, so it shouldn't even count.
Maynard throws his head back and cackles evily.

Q: What is the best thing about Ages of Despair?
A: Well, now that most of the archies are gone, I would have to say the actual game is just fun as hell. I miss Neme and Simon a lot though.
A: And Ordred, but that's a given

Q: What is the worst thing about Ages of Despair?
A: Assassins and Evaan
Maynard lafs.

Q: Why assassins?
A: They are overpowered, and make all my hard work look like crap,.

Q: Do you have any driving ambitions on AOD? Is there anything that you want to achieve or perhaps something that you have already achieved?
A: YES! I want to have the intelligence of 400, max faerie psi/woodland/ with 24 levels in druid, and one in thief. Hopefully then my channel will be the besterest on the mud!

Q: What is OldSkooled?
A: OldSkooled took it's name from a web comic which involves the sprites of characters from FFI(great game). "Back in the day" Godhand (who was at least half my level at the time) started the clan because we wanted to inform all the other chars that "Hey, we may be lower level, but we started back in the day." I am the soul member of OldSkooled currently, but others are welcome.

Q: Ah Godhand, is he still about?
A: If he is he doesn't want me to know, maybe i pipe bombed his house one to many ti....umm...can you remove that last part?

Q: What do you think we need to do to keep high level players here, to keep long term interest in the game?
A: Well, i believe the ONLY thing that would improve aod is to expand on >current< areas, make them larger. The old areas are great, but they need to have a little more rooms or something.

Q: Is there any advice you would like to give to new players that just entered our world?
A: Stay out of my Avalon! I only need 50k more til I'm well into first place.

Other / Strange:

Q: Were you ever convicted of a crime?
A: Never. Why would I break a law and risk being kicked off?

Q: How many friends/family play?
A: 8 or so friends, my bro has tried playing but can't handle it.

Q: Favourite quote?
A: "Who am I? Where am I? Where are my pants?"

Q: What music are you listening to now?
A: Allen Sherman's "Hello muddah, hello faddah"

Q: Is there anything else you would like to mention about yourself or your life?
A: Eerrrr, Dallis smells good and Estelle is purty no matter what she thinks

Q: If you could remove one of the questions from this interview and replace it with another one, which would you remove and what would you replace it with?
A: Hmm, "What is the best thing about Ages of Despair?" would be replaced by "Who are you, and what the hell are you doing with my lawn gnomes!?"

Q: And of course I will have to ask you to answer your own question now.
A: I'm Maynard Almare, Slayer of Puppies, and I'm him the language of loooove.

Q: Who would you like me to interview next, and why?
A: Maendon, cause he's the sexiest of the se...I mean, cause he can kill Evaan without trying that hard? (he could summon a death blade or 23 into his stomach.)

Q: If I do that interview, is there a specific question that you want me to ask?
A: Why are you so se....How is it that you summon death blades for newbies just as fast as experienced players? Don't you have any morals?
Maynard grins.

Q: Do I have your permission to make this information public on the People of AoD webiste or any other media?
A: Heck yes sir, heck yes

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